The evening was depressing, The air carried misery from a thousand hearts possibly, The sun didn't seem like it felt like shedding light on this pathetic world. I could see elderly people walking their dogs and contractors walking back and forth, I could see a dead leaf fall from a tree, and that fat mamak dude who totally has a crush on my mom at his house, across the street . I on the other hand, Was home alone,Well, Not exactly, my maid was around, But she's in her own world so I guess her company wouldn't make much difference. I was sitting on my couch, Watching some American Pie movie that JJ installed into my Ipod. As the credits played, My mind slowly wondered off again. It's just occurred to me that... I have no life. I sit here at my computer day by day, Blogging about how miserable I am that some guy didn't call me back or about my mom PMS-ing or about... well, poetic stuff. I'm.. Really.. Lame. It's then I thought of learning psychology maybe. So I can manipulate/control people and tell when they're lying. Indirectly, It's a way to rule the world. Love on the other hand...



Is Bullshit to me now.


Love makes the world such a sad place. For so many years now, I see couples around me killing themselves softly by getting on each other's nerves. Just cause He forgot their anniversary or She doesn't give him enough attention or He gets horny and sleeps with his colleague or She buys the wrong peanut butter or He talks to another girl or She gets too friendly with his best friend and He misunderstands or She.. WELL YOU GET MY DRIFT.

Why do people still bother going through this bullshit? And then they come to me and tell me they love the guy and they cant live without him but he's killing them. haha, Dude, You sound so poetic. Is he really all that? Isn't love supposed to be about... Happiness? Trust? Kindness? and all that other shit? What's with all these mindless suffering? It's not that you'd sacrifice the misery for him/her. It's just that... You love the misery don't you?!
It gives you something to think about. I remember so long ago, My friend just got with her boyfriend, and she was complaining on how they haven't fought yet, haha!
Well, I can't blame her. What's a relationship without drama? I'd seriously get bored if every night is just "goodnight honey, I love you!" and then in the morning I'd get breakfast in bed or something and then during the day I get a random flower. Ew. Why can't he just cheat on me so I have a reason to start a fight?! No, I'm not saying I want him to cheat on me! I don't even have a 'He' to think about but.. Ugh, This is besides my point.


My point is... I've got bored of love. I've got bored of the heartache, The empty words, The roses, The memories, The text messages that never got replied, Everything. The whole concept just bores me to death now. I've become sceptical. I just don't see the beauty of love anymore. I guess You could say, I gave up on love. I got sick of it. Love is naive. People say I'm only 15, and that I have a goddamn long life ahead of me but then again, If at this age, Love seems like diarrhea before the exam of your life, Then what makes Love the answer to your prayers when you grow a little older? People just get fucked up day by day right?


Life is the beautiful painting my mom hung up on the wall. Love is the crayon my little brother used to colour all over it.